Thursday 15 November 2012

sad

my nan is in hospital with a broken hip. she was so good when I saw her on sunday and gave her the new clothes. I am so sad. But I am so angry with my family who refuse to come and be with her. I'm sick of hearing their feeble excuses. I've had to tell work I just don't know if I'll be in today; I just don't want Nan to be all alone and I'm going in to just be with her and hold her hand. Her sister was there yesterday.

I keep getting a visual of my nan and me sitting on a bench in the most beautiful garden I've ever seen; so many wonderous perfumed flowers, sun shining, bees buzzing, birds singing, and my nan is crocheting a rug and she is asking me how everyone is (every 10 minutes or so because she has dementia). It is so peaceful and feels so wonderful.

I don't know what is going to happen. My family don't want the operation to take place. They would rather be cowards and hope that nan will just pass away, but worse case she may linger on pain killers for the rest of her life (even if that is weeks, months or years) with no hope. Even if its not possible to recover, at least if she has the operation and survives she's got something to fight for and can go down fighting like she always has in the past. I don't know. I don't know what is best. I just feel its wrong for her to be on her own at this point in time, so I'm going to the hospital today.

I don't know if I'm strong enough. I don't know what to say. But I'm going.

4 comments:

  1. Oh Kyllie, I'm so sorry for your heartache. It is a wonderful thing that you are staying by your Nan's side, what a blessing you must be to her! I'm thinking of you and sending lot's of love and peace your way xoxoxoxo

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  2. Kylie so sorry to hear about your Nan. I agree with Jess that it is a blessing you are with her.
    Sending lots of love
    Mary x

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  3. My nan has had the operation (to pin her fractured hip) and it looks really good at this stage. 4 hours after the op she was sitting up, talking and eating a meal!!! I just love her resillence! thank u for your comments!

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  4. Hi again! backtracking your blog I know that your nan has had the operation and that you've been there with her in the hospital. I think it's a disgrace when people ignore our elderly, especially if it's a family member. To be 98 years old and be sitting up 4 hours after the op, that's love of life for me and not someone who's knocking on heavens door. You go girl, you did the right thing and I am SO happy that you did!! Kisses and hugs,

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